The fog has cleared, I am on a road. The destination, is unknown although there are a lot of roads and a lot of land on either side where I can build a new road.
Right now, I feel like I just drove through an intersection and I can’t remember if the light was red or green. I’m too busy wondering where I am going. I’m too busy looking ahead for obstructions, for speed bumps, for uncomfortable situations.
Every moment up until now has been of my making. Every moment I have enjoyed, but where do I go now. If I stay on the road I wanted long ago, I will end up at a place I don’t want to be. I can’t stay here, there is too many people going by without me, I can’t think, I can’t feel. The longer I stay on the side of the road, the further everything moves away from me.
Something is inside me, its wants more. People say I’m content, but I am far from it. I am more confused than ever and now I don’t know which way I came from on this road. The clouds are gathering again, they are black and full of the liquid of life.This liquid will pass over my body, like a snake passing over a boulder. It will cleanse my skin, but won’t cleanse my soul.
I want to get cover, but there is no shelter here. I can’t protect myself any more, I must go on, I must make my own path, a new path to behold.
I turn around and next to the road is a stone. This stone has an arrow on it, pointing to the west. The west, why the west I don’t know. I don’t know if it is even an arrow, but my brain has told me it is so.
There are three doors in the ground. One is wood, one is steel and one has no door.
The door with no door, is the easy way. It leads back to where I am.
The door of wood, is not that hard to open. I can use my foot to kick it up if I have to. But down there, is another road. It looks like this one, but just a little different. The road has a different surface, but the countryside it passes through is the same.
The final door, is the steel door. This is the door I want. This is the door I need. It will take all of my energy, all of my power to open it. It is so thick and heavy, I can’t even imagine what is below it.
I hear no sounds from the steel door. It’s completely unknown, and I am not sure of how I will be or what I will be when I enter it. Sure I can sit in front of it, maybe wait until someone leaves and opens the steel door from the inside, but that’s not what I want.
I want to open the door myself.
For now, I take the door with no door.
Another day, is what I say.